Saturday, July 3, 2010

An open letter to God...

Dear God,
Thank you for making us and this beautiful planet we live on. In spite of the fact that you knew we'd screw up so much of everything (okay, practically everything) that you made with no flaws to speak of. If it was me, I'd have probably pulled the whole flood things multiple times by now... but you and your rainbow promises - you keep 'em. You're awfully patient.
Really sorry about the whole screwin' up things... I mean, really sorry. You planned it all out so perfect and for everything to have it's balance and rhythm, then we get all smarty pants and go and mess it all up... like we know more than you. No excuses, we're just dumb... and on behalf of all of us, "I'm sorry".

How come you did it though? Why? When you knew what jackasses we'd be to you and each other? I guess you must have thought we were worth it...I guess that's how I feel about my own kids. No matter what they do, they are mine. They are my heart outside of my own body and whether they do or not, I long for them to love me and be with me. Is that how you feel? I'm sorry that some days I even forget to tell you hello. You really deserve more than being forgotten about. I will try to remember that...

By the way, since you know everything 'n all. I have a few friends that I wanted to talk to you about. I'll spare names since you know 'em already. My friend whose heart is really hurting, would you please nuzzle a little closer to her today... so she can feel ya'. Sometimes we need to feel you or we have a hard time believing you're really there. And my other friend who's got the weight of the world on his shoulders... would you come alongside him and hold him up? He needs to know you've got his back. My other friend is really weary and just needs some hope. Can you remind her that you are bigger than all these things that she's tempted to believe she's at the mercy of. And my friend who is feeling lost... maybe even feeling all the things mentioned above but can't quite figure out why. Would you smother them in that peace you say doesn't make sense to us but is the only kind you bother with.

Thanks for listening and caring. Thank you for not being that God I grew up believing you were. Thanks for wanting to make us whole and mend our broken places. Thanks for leaning into us when we keep walking away. Thanks for being kind and not giving us what we deserve. Thanks for not holding all our failures against us. Thanks for believing in us and wanting more for us than we even want for ourselves. Thanks for changing us when we become willing to let you. You really are good and I love you.

By the way, thanks for the friends you've given me. They are a gift I have no suitable words to thank you for.

Love,
Jess